Saturday, November 29, 2008

The Wall Street Circus

Click to enlarge

Doesn't the skeptical part of you say this is exactly what happens?! Me too.

Friday, November 28, 2008

Emo Storm Trooper

This could spawn a whole new television series.
"Star Wars: The Soap Opera"
oooo! I've got goose bumps!

Thursday, November 27, 2008

Sorry...The Daily Item is "off the air."

In lieu of Thanksgiving, The Daily Item will be off-air today.
Goodnight, and have a pleasant tomorrow.


Wednesday, November 26, 2008

If you're the type of Vegan that likes to tell total strangers that you, "don't eat meat" please stop.


My buddy Glen Wheeler said it best: "If we're not supposed to eat cows...how come they taste like meat?"

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Crisp, Clean...and no Caffeine! Then hysteria.

I've been up to some serious business here at the Daily Item. You are all friends so I'll let you in on a little known national secret. Don't tell anyone though.

You know the economic crisis that we just we've been going through? You know how the stocks have all dropped drastically? Well a lot of that blame was on the credit and banking industry. Once that collapsed everything else snowballed. That's what CNN is saying anyway. Furthermore as our economy crashed so have the world markets.

Here on the Daily Item, I have the real reason why the stocks crashed and everything is snowballing.

I'm serious here so listen.

A while back I quit drinking caffeinated beverages. Listen, I'm not saying caffeinated beverages are all bad. They may work for you. I, however am a goldfish and will drink every and all caffeinated beverages I can find until my money is gone. That's why we don't have a VCR or DVD player anymore...I sold them for more caffeinated beverages. I used to have a Corvette...Gone...for caffeinated beverages. I stopped drinking them right before the markets crashed. I was spending a fortune on these drinks. I can't tell you how many I drank a day but let's assign this mathematical equation to it:

Cokem = atan2(sin(lat1) + sin(lat2), √((cos(lat1)+Bx)² + By²)).
That's an insane amount of money and caffeine.

Soon after quitting I began to receive calls from numerous companies...Coke, Pepsi, Mountain Dew etc...As it turns out my quitting caused a a stock slump of 22.07 3/4 on the NYSE the very first week. I'm not sure how they figured out it was me. It could have been from the free MP3's that you can get when you turn in a pop cap. Let's see I have 27000 MP3's and you get 1 free MP3 per every 10 pops you drinks, so that's...hmmm, let's see... Well you get the idea.

Timeline:
  1. I quit caffeinated beverages
  2. Loss of revenue causes Coke and Pepsi Stocks to drop dramatically
  3. Chain reaction in other stocks causes them to drop
  4. Global Markets Plummet.
  5. Hysteria
Simple really.

Little did I know that our National and even Global economy were linked to the all powerful Coca Cola and Pepsi Companies (who knew?) And finally I had no idea that stopping cold turkey on these products would eventually lead to Global mass hysteria. I'm sorry so let me just say...my bad.

I feel bad about the economy and all. It's crummy that I had something to do with it. But you know I feel so much more healthy now.

I've included pictures showing me before and after my addiction.

Enjoy!


Before

After

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

Best Wishes

The Holidays are almost upon us...
Best Wishes from The Daily Item

Tuesday, November 18, 2008

The Ketchum Krud

I've been sick the last 4 days. Seeking a priesthood blessing I invited some men over to administer to my sick self. Before the blessing My friend Kary Yates announced to me that I had the "Ketchum Krud." A nasty condition that awaits most newcomers to the valley, he described the symptoms in detail (it sounded a lot like the common cold). Anyway... this nice person brought his own home remedy for me to take. He even made it for me. The contents were this: Idaho Bee Honey and Lemon Juice. You combine those two ingredients and heat to 900 Kelvin (dang hot!). Then drink. I did. Tart and Tasty I must say. "oh and drink this..." he said. As he handed me a bottle of Nyquil! I puckered through the entire blessing.

Friday, November 14, 2008

Oh, I wish I were an Oscar Mayer Weiner....

Ever have those days where you wish you could escape from the bonds of the status quo and just jump into a nearby Weinermobile and jet off into the sunset? Me too. 'sko!

Monday, November 10, 2008

Beloved Friends

We have been blessed with really good friends. Occasionally our good friends come to Sun Valley and visit us. Such was the case this last weekend as we were fortunate to have: Anna, Claire, Elise, Sam, Sonja and Jeremy Ames come and stay with us. Our entire family loves the Ames and we are grateful for their friendship!


Group picture! Count the Lolipops!


Elise with our great big cat "chocolate."

We were treated to exceptional theatre Sunday evening.

The cast included:

Sam Ames - The King
Penny Hope - The Servant
Jacob Hope - The Knight
Claire Ames - The pretty girl
Elise Ames - The Ferocious Lion!

Actress in a Romantic Leading Role: And the winner is...

It's Major Award Time on The Daily Item.

Watching a certain movie last night I was reminded of some of my favorite female leads in the movies. I've decided to put together a short list of nominees for my favorite actress in a lead role and have a winner declared here on the Daily Item.


Nominee #1: Olivia Newton John - Grease

Ok, I'll take a lot of heat from my wife on this. But hey, Olivia Newton-John is great in this film. Sweet accent, great singer and well...duh, pretty. I know a lot of people that like this movie and I know a lot of women that hate it. The women I've talked to don't like how Sandy goes from prim and proper to wearing leather at the end of the movie to get her man. What these sweet ladies don't catch on to is rough acting Danny Zuko loses the leather and dons a letter sweater to catch her! Trust me...it'll work out.


Nominee #2: Julie Christie - Heaven Can Wait

As a 9th grader we went and saw this film with my Teachers quorum. At the time there could be no better movie ever. Football guy meets girl in trouble. Watching this movie in 1978 I was thinking...Oh - My - Gosh! This is the best!
Julie Christie had found success in the movie Dr. Zhivago. A tedious movie that had "somewhere my love" playing in every single scene. Aaaaaaggghhhh! If it wasn't for the cinematography this film would have wreaked. However in Heaven Can Wait she played "Teacher lady" from Pagleshem England. Infuriated that ExoGray Industries was building a nuclear plant in her village which would displace hundreds she travels to the US to meet with the CEO of ExoGray who happens to be Leo Farnsworth. Who...had really been drowned by his wife and her lover but the spirit of this "football guy" who had accidentally died to soon because his escort pulled him out of mortality too soon because he thought "it would hurt" had been put into his body before he actually died. Whew.... get any of that? Anyway, "late 70's Farah Fawcett hair" good acting, sweet accent and being pretty put Julie Christie on the list



Nominee #3: Donna Reed - It's a Wonderful Life

Holy Cow. Without question the most beautiful woman in Hollywood history is without a doubt Donna Reed (with Grace Kelly coming in a close second). When we first see Donna's character "Mary"in this film she is a little girl possibly 10 years old. She whispers into "George's (James Stewart) bad ear, "George Bailey, I'll love you till the day I die!" Of course George doesn't hear it. The second time we see Mary she is in a crowd at the dance. She has just been introduced as some guy's "kid sister." The camera pans to her and what we behold his shear feminine beauty! It's Mary caught slightly off guard as she meets the man of her dreams George Bailey. The look on her face is extraordinary. Later as a wife and mother of several children she does and says the things that good mom's and wife's say and do. She ultimately saves the day. She's an inspiration that parallels my own circumstance.


Nominee #4: Eve - Wall-E


OK, odd I know to have a droid as a nominee. But hey, her gender was obvious and there will never, ever be a female droid in a major motion picture as good as this little gun carrying droid. Eve is all business as she is sent to Earth to investigate for any signs of life. There is no human life but she does meet up with another droid who is...you guessed it: Male in gender and hopefully romantic, possibly even a little co-dependant. So in this movie you have Eve: who is super talented, tough, smart and really pretty with crescent shaped eyes when happy. Then you have Wall-E who is somewhat cloddish and possibly co-dependent. Sound remotely familiar??
There is a scene in this movie where Wall-E is presumed dead and Eve is looking over him all sad. She says, "Wall-E!" and something else but I can never hear what she says because I'm CRYING TOO LOUD! I've seen the film twice. Cried both times. Yeah I know. Freaking pathetic.


And for the Best Actress in a Romantic Leading Role and winner of the Daily Item "World on his Shoulders" Award!...









Eve! From: Wall-E!

Friday, November 7, 2008

Daily Item Random Quiz #11

I see what you're looking at. You want the dough don't you. Yesssirree. Big Donuts. One Million Donuts!

One Million Daily Item Dollars are at stake in today's contest. What can you do with One Million Daily Item Dollars?? Shoot...for One Million Daily Item Dollars you can come to Hailey (Sun Valley) and stay with the Hope's! Included in the stay will be fantastic food from Roo's Kitchen and a nice comfy trundle bed and/or huge beanbag that you and your kids/spouse can sleep on.

This is a once in a lifetime chance to win One Million Daily Item Dollars.

Here's today's Random Quiz:

1. Name the encampment/village below.
2. Name the metropolitan in which this place is located
3. Tell me why it is important to: not depreciate non-taxable items brought forth from the previous tax year. (kidding)

Good Luck annnnnnd GO!

Click on picture to enlarge

Thursday, November 6, 2008

New Snow in the Valley

It's that time of year again. Pretty soon the big snow will be here and Skiers and Snowboarders will show up from all over the place. Skiing is a big deal here and there is a buzz in the air as Sun Valley likes to open their gates by Thanksgiving. Last winter we had more snow here than I had ever seen in my entire lifetime. This year is supposed to be very similar to last


This picture is looking up Bald Mountain (Sun Valley)


Looking slightly NW out of Ketchum



Obviously this will mean no more tennis until spring.

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Obama Wins

I wasn't an Obama supporter. And, I didn't vote for Obama. But, I am happy to be part of history. I'm happy to see that an African America can be voted in as President of the United States of America. In my mind this says a lot about the percieved racial tension versus the actual racial tension. I hate racism. Let me write that again. I hate racism! But even more, I hate people who falsely claim racism. You know who you are and you know what I mean.

I am happy for the millions of African American people who never in their lifetime thought that this could happen. My heart goes out to these folks. How happy they must be! Quite honestly I have my doubts about his Presidency but I hope that he'll prove me wrong. And while I may not have supported him prior to the election I will pray for our new President just like I have all the other President's prior to him. Good luck Obama!

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

If you live in California... Vote Yes on Prop 8.

Find your own correlation.

Abandoned Clown Train

There is something certainly creepy about this picture.

Monday, November 3, 2008

Can you tell me where the bathroom is?

I've never been to China. But I have had to use the bathroom real bad before. Ever have that sudden burst of "I've got to go RIGHT now" and the bathroom looks like it is this far away. Me too. Hate it.

Ever use those public restrooms where the toilet paper is the size of a saltine cracker and the dispenser only lets you get one little square at a time? Or how about the bargain toilet paper that I swear is made out of cheese grader material. Dang! Hate it.

Places not to go to the bathroom:
  • Target
  • Flying J (#1 is OK, they have the cool ads to read while your standing there.)
  • Anywhere in England or Mexico
  • Burger King (the restrooms are not King)
  • Any public High School
  • Any Asian restaurant (you know why)
  • Any Airport (if you have to use an airport restroom...do not tap your foot!).
  • Auburn Super Mall (bad things, very bad things)
  • Woodland Park bathrooms. (never trust anyone loitering in the bathroom)
  • Construction site toilet. (not cool, you never know when someone is going to tip it over). Bad.
The Daily Item recommends these fine public restrooms.
  • McDonalds (you don't even have to order anything. Just run in (pun) and run out.
  • Sears Department Store (I was in looking for tools a little too long and then it was time. I was delighted by the nice quiet unused restroom.
  • Shell Gas. (typically small room, tile from ground to ceiling, locked doors and Muzak over the loudspeaker)
  • Just about any hotel. (Use and enjoy my friends. Most people here will use their room bathrooms).
I'm sure there are others. These are my staples however.