My Mother and Father died when they were 60 and 62 respectively. My Mother died of cancer but my Father died in his sleep with what we thought was some sort of stomach or colon cancer. I have no idea why an autopsy wasn't performed to determine the cause of death...
OK. I'm bitter about that. (I'll save that for another day)
Nonetheless, when my doctor heard the above story he demanded that I get a colonoscopy done ASAP to ensure that I'm healthy and fit below the equator. So, after a month or so of rescheduling due to flat out panic, I am submitting myself like a death row inmate to the Flying J Truck Stop (isn't that where they are all performed?) tomorrow morning where the doctor will perform this nasty procedure.
Initially I heard that I would be able to sleep through this procedure with the help of anesthetic. Today I learned that this would not be the case. Instead they'll give me a drug to make me "loopy."
(Insert your own joke: Here)
My "procedure" will be tomorrow at 8:30AM (for you well wishers). The evil doctor has asked me to drink a gallon bottle of anti-freeze this evening.
So I am alone with a bottle of anti-freeze and condemned to not stray to far from the indoor terlet.
Should something go horribly wrong, know that I love you all. Blast.